Courtney Vs Coogan

Crikey, I wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of Courtney Love.

She's one scary lady.

And when she opens that enormous mouth she's even more terrifying.

That mouth gives Freud's "vagina dentata" a (w)hole new spin.

Especially if you are Mr Steve Coogan, erstwhile lover of Love.

He's a brave man.

But Steve must be now regretting the consequences raining down on him for holeing up with Love; and- it is reported- spreading the love and sharing the ample stash.

Courtney and Coogan are both friends of Owen Wilson.

Sadly, Owen tried to kill himself a few days ago and Courtney is laying the blame for Owen's descent into drug-induced depression at Steve's door.

It is not often that a celebrity goes on the record pointing the finger (unsteadily) in such an acusatory manner.

Once would be shocking enough.

But Courtney has now spoken out again- and this time she's calling on him to Get Outta Town.

Why is she so down on Steve?

She says that when she got out of rehab he showed up with drugs.

That he is a bad influence.

A phrase springs to mind:

"You spot it, you got it!"

And another more positive one:

"Stick with the winners".

Nobody makes us relapse.

We are the ones who pick up.

It is our responsibility to work a daily programme of recovery and to have as many tools as possible to deal with whatever comes up.

Living life on life's terms is sh*t somedays.

But whatever life throws at us we can get through it with the help of a programme of recovery, the help of a Higher Power (whatever you want that to be, as long as it's not just you), and by keeping it One Day At A Time.

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Sex addiction is a form of the illness that people who are not addicts often have a good old giggle about- even more so than shopping; which is also perceived as a bit of a laugh.

But the consequences of sexual compulsivity and addiction are often horrific: broken relationships, estranged children, self-hatred, suicide attempts, STDs, massive debts (porn and working girls aren't cheap); the list goes on.

It is often a hidden addiction too and one that people- both men and women- can hang onto, post-chemical detox- that, if not faced honestly, will usually lead back to substance abuse.

How can you develop self-worth when you are continuing to act-out- using sex as a fix and adding to shame by treating yourself and other human beings with a lack of respect; and as mere objects?

There's a very good reason why it's advised to not have relationships in early recovery: I would suggest for the first two years.

Relationship problems (the lows and the highs) are the number one cause of relapse.

It's difficult enough dealing with your own emotional roller-coaster.

Keep It Simple.

When you are a few years down the line (off the lines?) you can fall in love and have a stupid argument- like I did with H this evening..because I "tutted" about something I didn't like and she got the hump..and not feel like a drink to cope with the feelings.

I have made my amends (Step 10) and..

Tomorrow is another day.